The 4 Marriage ‘rules’ that will never change…and to stick to

Marriage is considered the final stop of a couple’s many years of courtship, saying the words ‘I do’ in front of friends and family is considered one of life’s most precious moments.

Many of the older folk will have plenty of advice before or on the special day – most of them include loving each other no matter the situation and working together as a team. Lets also not forget that one uncle (or aunty) that will always want to make a speech – where a cringe moment is often not too far away.

Despite public opinion, getting married is not as expensive as one would think. Using myself as an example, my wife (then fiancé) and I didn’t have bucket loads of money to spend, so we had to do things within the confides of a budget. Everything from the venue to the dress/suit and transportation for everyone came to just below R20 000 – though lockdown restrictions at the time also played a part.

An important point to take into consideration is that the marriage is between you and your partner. Yes, there will undoubtedly be input and suggestions from family members so they worth listening to because they have ‘been there and done that’.

Getting used to each other

After years of dating (and possibly not living together) it is only you and your partner. What this means is that, you learn more about personal habits and how they do things. Accommodating each other and making compromises, for example, one might like watching movies while the other is more into series.

Don’t go to bed angry

Even though it might sound cliché, it is not good for people’s emotional and mental well-being to go to bed with unresolved issues or anger still lingering. Spending a brief moment apart (between 10 to 20 minutes) to just cool things down is one way of going about things. Also, stubbornness can make it difficult to create a steady flow of communication between individuals.

Listen first, then talk

Depending on emotions and personality, it can become very easy to talk over one another and can thus lead to a screaming match. No matter what the topic, listen to what your partner has to say, digest the information and reply in a respectful manner. You have to remember that you guys are a team and no when problems arise, they must be solved together – two is better than one.

Communicate

This is perhaps the most important out of the lot because everything above is linked to communication. Put all the cards on the table in a sense of maybe saving towards buying new rims for your car, applying for a credit card or even just having a night out with friends. Hiding things or keeping it secret is never a wise idea, whereas being open and honest is simply easier.

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